Emotions at work

Imagine that you just got to work(not necessarily IT), you are about to begin your day but one of these things will happen… how would you react?

1. You will hear that your best friend at work had a wonderful thing and are over the moon.

maybe you’ll scream and dance in joy .. party your heart out at the end of your day.

2. You see that the deadline you had is preponed and things are looking tough.

you’ll curse the time… throw your hands in the air and then maybe take a quick break and then plan what’s to be done next.

3. You get a message from your family that they’ll be away from you for a few days and you’ll have to manage everything.

You’ll think about how to manage things while they are away.

4. You get a message from your colleague that they had an emergency and might not be as active as expected

you’ll worry for them and ask them if everything is under control and then maybe let them know that they can reach out if anything is needed…

— maybe….

In our daily life, I’m sure we come across millions of such incidents, I’m sure we all know how to react to the first one in seconds but are a bit hesitant on the last one …now my ponder is…!!

Why do we react to happy things so easily than the other incidents and those on the receiving ends sometimes are compelled to suppress the things that would be regarded as negative? 

Many don’t know how to react when someone else shared the most saddest and vulnerable news…!! Are we too shocked to talk or too inexperienced? Or maybe both!

Happiest things are discussed openly and announced publicly but things such as family exigency, medical exigency, legal matters, and any magnitudes of abuse or violence are all termed as just one emergency to all and then are discussed privately, at a high level only. 

I agree one of the reasons is privacy and comfort .. what about the support that is required at these times? though human beings have flight or fight responses they need support .. and are we confident that we give them the required support without judgement? If someone reaches out to us in private are we equipped to emotionally relate with them and then give our honest support…

Is this why we don’t share things and just mark it one word as “emergency”..?

Speaking from experience, animals though can’t express themselves with words they can identify when someone is unhappy, and especially at those times they come to you and sit with you silently .. why are we failing to do that..??

Have you ever observed that plant grows lovely when you care more and pets react better when cared for with love.. kids love the more warm ones.  

Now the title says emotions at work… the reason why only work is highlighted here is that at work we become this non-emotional robot whose main agenda is to work what is intended exchange a few formal thoughts and conversations and then get back to your life… my question is isn’t work a major part of life? Wouldn’t our activities at work impact our lives the most? If so why are these barricades, a timeline fixed for everything including your sorrow and grief...

Why is there a need to behave so cold and formal and why do we hesitate so much to express ourselves at work? Is it because we treat everyone (except work best friends) as still strangers? 

Until and unless the work world has emotional intelligence applied until the problems are not marked as trivial in any context and the fixed boundaries for any issue resolution are lifted, we will still have quiet grievances, and discomfort robots at work. Sure some might gruntle and disagree saying work is not a therapy office, shouldn't it be? If our world is all good then we wouldn't need external support that actively, many would yearn for support at work as they are too tired to be everything everywhere.. empathy need not be a burden and will not be a burden if you listen to others … 

How nice will life be if, in reality, you can rely on work to be emotionally candid and on support at times of emergency.. like family…

Believe me, an honest try is all it takes..!